I have always LOVED being a mom, since the moment I was able to become one. But it wasn't until this Mother's Day, that I really, truly appreciated it for what it really is. I am the mom to *almost* 6 children. God has granted me 6 little souls to raise up in this world. And having 6 little souls doesn't make me any more worthy then someone who has one or two souls to raise up. Actually, its more daunting, if anything else...the more little souls I am responsible for, the more opportunities that I might fail one or more.
Motherhood isn't all rainbows and butterflies. Motherhood include innumerable joys for sure, but also innumerable moments of heartache and hardship. Moments-from conception on, that bring you to your knees. That first moment your child exerts their free will, acting VERY contrary to how you would have hoped them to act. At times, acting positively mortifying. Over and over and over again. That moment when they say something hurtful, either intentionally or nonintentionally. Those moments that you have to spend up most of the night, cleaning up throwup, giving motrin and breathing treatments, so tired yourself that you want to give up and run away. And then as they get older, their problems get bigger and more serious and MORE exasperating. They don't put those moments in a hallmark card.
But as mothers, we learn to get through a situation as "neatly" as we can (sometimes barerly holding on to our sanity) and we are able to see the next day with a smile. Because through all the difficulties, we appreciate that it takes A LOT of work to mold these helpless little beings into good, genuine, appreciative, hard working adults. As a little bonus, God gives all these little joys that come with parenting to remind us of the ultimate greater good-the rainbow at the end of the storm. As much as I have tried to simply relish in the good and ignore the bad these last 6 years, I have come to the point where I now can appreciate the bad as well, bc it brings us to a newer and better "good" eventually. All those bad moments are nothing more then learning opportunties. When the kids are sick as dogs, it really makes you appreciate their health. When their behavior is absolutely deplorable, and you have to correct them a million times in one day, it really makes you smile when you see them act in a way that makes you feel proud. When you see your older children giving a little "lesson" themselves to the younger ones, on why this or that is not a good idea because...., well it reminds you that as much as you think you might be ignored the 100 times you have to say something, that in actuality, they are still taking in little (albeit sometimes miniscule) moments of value in each of these learning opportunities.
Becoming a mother has been a HARD journey for sure. It was much easier when I had 3 kids, 2 and under in some ways, just bc they were only starting to exert their free will at the time. Now I have free will flying in 5 different directions here, and its a constant battle to stay on the upper hand of it all. I have learned a lot throughout the years, and am still learning, every day I get further into the thick of it . Most especially, I am really trying hard not to speak with an automatic sharp tongue, but instead to think for a moment, and then respond in a thoughtful way, so that all 5 kids can learn something from whatever moment we are having. Its an ALL DAY job-starting as soon as these little people wake up, and not ending until the last is asleep at night!!! Every day of the week. Every week of the year. Every year for what feels like it could be forever.
So when I think of Mother's Day now, I don't just think of a group of women that have gotten to enjoy nothing but bliss and joy of being mothers. There is bliss and joy, no doubt, buts its intermingled with other less pleasant moments. We are clued into this right from the start of pregnancy, with sickness and aches and pains and sometimes heartache...and then a birth to get through, that this journey is not going to be an easy one at all Instead, I think of a group of women that should be revered for fighting the good fight, working through the todays to hopefully one day lead to a better and brighter tomorrow, filled with our one day grown up children....and then grandchildren. On Mother's Day, we can celebrate the kinship we share with all mothers all over the world, those of the past, the present and the future-that have fought/are fighting the good fight right alongside us. I am proud to be "one" of them today...and every day!!! If mothering my children is the only BIG goal I ever accomplish in my lifetime, I will still feel like I went to the moon and walked it in its entirety. And we all should feel that way!
Happy Mother's Day to all my fellow moms!!!! Here's to a day/a week/a month/a year filled with MANY joys, as well as many great "learning opportunities" for us all! :)