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Monday, February 14, 2011

Things are just kinda weird....

My husband lost his job of 7 years.  Just feels weird.

Having him home 24/7.  Weird, but great.

Having our pay cut DRAMATICALLY, but thanks to unemployment, not to nothing.  Weird, but hopefully life changing.

Having him start a part time job soon after being home for almost a month.  Weird...and gonna miss him.

Having life flying past so crazy fast right now.  Weird.  Makes me miss the slowness of my life on bedrest.

Having a baby that is 8 months old already, and about to crawl.  Weird.  He was a newborn for like 2 seconds it seems.  Most of it was the drugged haze I was in for the first few months of his life.

Already being in mid February.  Weird.  Why is time going so fast?

Can't believe its almost been a year since I started bleeding and got diagnosed with the worst diagnosis.  And started my bedrest.  And thought every day I might have to deliver my baby.  And wondered if I would make it through my surgery.  Weird.  How has that already been a year?

Missing my uterus.  WEIRD?  Who misses a uterus?

I know we will move through all the weirdness to a more comfortable "new" kind of life.  Just waiting and wondering, wanting life to slow down enough for me to savour my last baby and my other 5, always growing/always changing kids, sometimes I want life to halt so I can process the last year properly, but then other times I want certain aspects of life to speed up, bc I am anxious to find out what more God has in store for us.  Weird may not always feel good, but God rocks our sometimes too comfortable worlds with these "weirds", and then uses the "weirds" to help us be better people.  Still working on figuring out what more God has planned with me and my family...and all I hope is that I don't let Him down.